Redemption

Alternate title:  White gloves are magic

Gotta admit, I was not eager to start this weekend.  Due to my inability to manage a calendar, I had an evening 5k on Saturday followed by my second rated dressage show of the year.  In Massachusetts.  And my first ride time was 9:30am.  This does not bode well for me.  A late night, then a horse show?  And a facility Theo's never visited.  I last visited this farm in 2005 with my horse Allen to do jumper shows.  My memories are a bit fuzzy.

I was very grown up and started my prep days ahead of time.  I had my horse bathed, braided, and ready to roll by 10:30am on Saturday.  By the time I left for my 5k, my trailer and truck were completely packed and I'd even given them a wash.  I told the hubby that he was sleeping in the guestroom so he wouldn't wreck my sleep by coming to bed at 1am.  I ended up with 5.5 hours of solid sleep, a shocking amount for me when I have a 4:30am wake up call.

I arrived at the show grounds bright and early, nabbing myself an absolutely premo parking spot.  Pull in, pull out, at the end of the row so Theo had a ton of space.  The parking was nutty in the middle of the day, I wouldn't have found a spot.  My backing skills still lack a lot.  I had time, so I lolly gagged.  I unloaded my horse to give him a good groom and discovered that he had somehow managed to rub out every single braid even with the sleazy on.  Every.  Single.  ONE.  REALLY?!?!

Not civilized

He's been in rubber band braids as of late due to his mane being stupid.  Another rant for another post.  I slammed some new braids in and forced myself to not freak over the fly aways.  After our last show, perfect braids were not my focus.  It's the same reason why I decided to wear my white gloves for the first time.  Marching around, doing the job, and staying in front of my leg were far more important than braids or my glove color.  I might as well ride in my beautiful new gloves that I've been saving for nearly a year.  I'll never really feel ready for them, so no point in waiting.

An awkward moment in a really good test (my friend has never photographed horses before), but hey, white gloves!  It's the moment of stepping (falling?) into canter.  But that turnout is totally on point.

I rode over to ring 2 and it was perfect for him.  Sand ring with warm up right alongside.  One judge booth, totally standard.  Sure, there were spectators on the hill and runners and all the usual commotion, but he's used to that now.  He seems more comfortable with spectators on one side where he can clearly see them.  A friend that knows nothing about horses came to keep me company and managed to keep me distracted and utterly chill.  I didn't turn into an alien because my friend never got tense or anxious or nervous.  We chatted about work until it was time for me to go.

We had one moment of sucking back while I was working around the ring and Theo saw some dumpsters that couldn't be seen from warmup, but it wasn't bad.  Put him above the bit for some movements while he tried to see what was going on over there, but he really was fantastic.  I also blew a transition when I forgot what letter to aim for.  C, M, whatever.  One day, one day I will get through an entire test without wondering where the hell I'm going.   But Theo was with me, focused, obedient.  I got my score of 64% and bounced up and down with excitement.  I even got a 6th place ribbon in a big class.  The judge wanted him more consistently on the bit, a valid comment with his moments of distraction and something I could totally fix for my second test.

Reading our first test together

We spent a couple hours chilling and stuffing food in Theo's face.  It was getting hot so my warm up for my second test was short and in the indoor.  When I moved outside, I heard the announcement that jackets were waived.  I was next in the ring so I started throwing off clothes so fast you'd think I was getting paid.  The steward knew I was there on my own so she grabbed my coat and stock tie for me, I really appreciated that.  I just barely made it, I was still adjusting my collar as I headed in for my test.

So much eating

Apparently keeping me distracted and relaxed works wonders.  Also riding my horse just like we're at home is a good thing.  The test felt really good.  He was so calm and confident, riding a test he knows and that feels easy for him.  That seems to be the key with Theo, that the tests are so easy that he never crosses over to negative tension.  Leg yield?  He can do that in his sleep.  Ten meter trot circle?  Pffft, whatever.  He even gave me a decent push in his lengthens despite the heat.

We got a freaking 67% for our First 3 test.  Third place in a big, competitive adult amateur class.  I almost started crying.  After our last show when I felt so defeated, to have a rated judge give me a score that says 'yes, you did it, and you did it well' felt amazing.  I finally rode a test like we do at home and we got a score better than I thought we would see.  I was hoping/praying/begging for a 64% while I waited for our scores.  I'd never even dreamed I'd see at 67%.

Winner winner chicken dinner

I know variations in scoring between judges can be huge.  But that's two 3rd place ribbons in classes of similar size at the same level.  Scores aside, I am starting to move up past the middle of the pack.  I guess that means we're ready to move up again after all.

Freestyle and Second Level, here we come!

Show days of summer

Show season is in full swing.  How do I know? 

1.  New tub of OxyClean for my white breeches, white shirts, white stock ties, white saddle pads, white horse boots, etc.  I've ranted before but I'll rant again, what is with all of the white??!!  I love my western turn out strictly because there's no white on it. 

2.  Bank account always seems to be lower than I thought.  I decided to get a stall for the western dressage championships so I can work him in the ring the day before.  And then I realized I really do need a show saddle blanket if I'm going to do a serious business western show.  With a matching shirt for me.  Ooof.  Ramen season it is.

 My new show pad, I got a royal blue shirt to go with it, best part was getting it on sale!

3.  The heat is insane!  95* today with a heat index around 100*.  When I wasn't showing it was unseasonably cool.  As soon as I hit my string of shows, nothing but heat advisories as far as the eye can see.  I got up at 5:45am to get my ride in while it was safe over the weekend and Trainer A is working him bright and early today.

4.  Coworkers are getting used to seeing me in breeches and boots as I squeeze in extra lessons and rides.  It's easier to torture, I mean desensitize, my horse with some help, so I'm keeping slightly odd hours in order to be at the barn when people are around.

5.  Stalking opening dates.  Not really as necessary with dressage as it was with eventing, but I'm always happier when I know for sure that I got in.  And I got a Starbucks gift card at one show for being the very first entry received.  Score!

6.  Copy of my Coggins found on the office scanner.  Yes, I got questions.  I've also learned to keep a copy of Theo's flu and rabies with me in the trailer after my last show where I forgot my flu paperwork and had to have it rush emailed to me by the vet's office.

7.  New shipment of ulcer medications for both Theo and myself.  Dosing him the day before a trip and each day of the trip has made him so much easier to handle.  Dosing myself keeps me from being utterly unmanageable at shows.

8.  Random dressage tests in my car, my purse, my living room, my office, my nightstand, and in my groom bag.  Also finding random bridle numbers in the same locations.  And somehow I never have a test when I'm in the ring and I still show up to warmup without my number.

9.  Reoccurring nightmares about missing ride times.  Seriously, had one last night where I was at Mount Holyoke for the western dressage championships and I couldn't find the door to the indoor while people counted down like I was on a game show.  Less tv before bed.

10.  Questioning my sanity on a regular basis.

Including my show last week, I've got four rated shows on my calendar between July 15 and Aug 22.  Four shows, five weeks.  Two are western dressage, two are traditional dressage.

I was going to do another traditional dressage show on Aug 26 but I'm rethinking that.  I have a 10 mile race on Aug 25, seems a bad idea to try to show the next day.

I wasn't going to do any rated showing this year, but then I decided that it would be a mistake to not have at least one check on my ego and barn blindness.  I went to sign up for one show, then saw one that was perfectly timed, then the western dressage shows got added, and here we are, in the throes of an actual show season.

Torturing the equine

Poor Theo.  I'm a terrible mother.  I talked to Trainer A and we have two things to work on over the next two weeks:

• Impulsion
• Working with distractions

Impulsion has improved mightily over the years, but clearly we need to make sure it's a very conditioned response so it doesn't fail when under pressure.  Leg goes on, pony goes forward.  Over.  And over.  And over.

And over.

Until I want to puke.  But that's how a conditioned response is created.  If he doesn't step forward promptly, he gets the little whip tap.  When he does, he gets the neck scritches.  We'll always need to work on this, but we're really going to focus in preparation for our next outing.

The distractions thing made Trainer A giggle with delight and clap her hands.  I've never been squeamish when it comes to torturing my pony in the name of desensitization and I've only gotten worse after our epic bombproofing clinic.  I have zero fear of what will happen when you surprise my horse.  Been there, done that, have the t-shirt.  Trainer A had full license to do whatever she wanted and she frankly needed it.  In his home indoor with people and horses he knows?  Mi papi is not particularly reactive.  He's in a safe place and he knows it.

She threw an empty milk jug around in a cubby where the jumps are kept, so he couldn't see her but could hear her banging around.  She found random equipment to bang against the walls when he went by.  She threw the barrels we use for jumping out of the cubby so they would bang and roll around.  She dragged out a huge piece of canvas and got her dog to ride around on it, tugging and growling, while she ran around the ring with it.  She banged on an empty barrel and sang loudly before rolling the barrel AT my horse while I was cantering.

She did it.  She shoved him into that hyper alert state where he starts to spook and stare at everything, even stuff he will usually ignore.  He spooked at a bag on the ground that he will usually pick up and carry around like a puppy.  I then worked him through it while not letting him brace or drop his back or suck back behind my leg.  It was not easy, especially when she started rolling barrels at us from the front and we had to canter by like nothing was happening.  It took a couple tries (and a little spank when he broke to trot) but he very bravely cantered by the moving threat with his tummy tucked up so it couldn't get him.

The reps were more for me than him.  Do NOT grab his face because he's distracted, get in the back seat and boot him along.  He knows how to be on the bit, once he's in front of my leg he goes into the contact just fine.  I know I can stop a bolt within a breath of it starting, so no need to guard against it.  If I want him to march past the scary thing, I can't also hold him back.  Over and over we went past scary, distracting things while I was reminded to give with my hands and get him in front of my leg.  Don't bring the bit back to him, shove him forward into the contact.  He knows what to do once he's there and frankly, he seemed to find the boundaries of the aids comforting.  His back came up.  I know it did because I could suddenly sit the trot just fine.  His hocks and stifles were definitely at work since he was trying to be as far from the things on the ground as possible. 

There was talk of recruiting the working students to stand around the outside ring with pom poms and do loud cheers while we run through our test.  No walk around for Theo, just straight up centerline with cheerleaders waving pom poms at C.  If this happens, I will demand video.

After that, the usual spectators should seem utterly boring. 

Disappointment

I have to keep reminding myself that the value of my horse and my riding isn't the number I get at a horse show.

This expression while watching a tree get dropped was his expression for pretty much the entire show

Went to my first rated show in a year.  We've worked our butts off, overhauled the way we go, and been well rewarded at the schooling shows.  I know schooling show scores are higher, but when you're consistently upper 60's, you feel ready to go out with the big kids.  Not win, but not look ridiculous.

It was a facility neither of us knew.  I was pleased to see that we would have one test in the indoor, one test in the outdoor.  We need the practice in new rings and indoors aren't something we see a lot of at rated shows.  The indoor ring had an indoor warmup, so he was mentally set on the idea of being in an indoor and he was used to the lighting.  He warmed up very well, nice and relaxed once he'd had a good look around.  I was first after the lunch break.  We went in as soon as they would let us, while the judge was still getting settled.

It was a very big indoor with two judge stands covered with flowers.  Theo stopped dead to stare at the judge, but walked by with minimal fuss.  He also stopped to stare at the empty judge stand on the side and I had to carefully tip toe him by so we could make it to A.  She rang the bell pretty quickly, so Theo didn't see much of the ring before centerline.

He was brave, I will give him that, but with so much to look at?  Wicked behind my leg and would suck back every time we were heading toward A.  The spectators were still getting settled, dropping things, going up the stairs to the observation area, etc.  He started to scoot at one point but came back so quickly I didn't even get a knock from the judge.  I did, however, get a knock on every movement for him being sucked back and distracted.  By the end of the test I was kicking like a Pony Clubber to make him canter toward the spectators.  Lengthens?  Not so much.  One was more of a loop because he was trying to step away from the empty judge's booth, the other got slower as we got closer to the moving people on the stairs.

It was survival mode, pure and simple.  I smiled at the end because he never spun, bucked, or quit on me.  It just wasn't the test we can do and I knew our score was going to suck.  I sat by the trailer with Theo between tests, eating a snack bar and trying to not be upset.  He was so, so much better than he would have been in the past.  It just wasn't good enough.

My second test was in an outdoor, far from the warm up area, with a storm blowing in.  Yeah, you can imagine how this went.  My slightly grumpy pony was giving me hints that he was thinking about being rude.  I picked him up instead of having him walking around on the buckle to make sure he didn't spin as the other horse left.  I didn't have to kick and I felt like the test was better.  He was tense and rather bug eyed, but I wasn't having to boot him around and he wasn't sucking back at one end of the ring.  He did give me one head shake and come off the rail at the end of his walk, but that was very brief.  I was actually very, very proud of him.  Out there alone in high winds and he was very honest. 

My first test score arrived after I was done with my second test.  I got a 60.000%.  I thought that was very fair for a distracted, behind the leg, but successful test.  I was 7th out of 9, right where I thought to be.  He was seen as a capable but distracted horse that needed more impulsion.

My second test arrived with a yellow ribbon on it and I got excited.  3rd out of 7?  That has to be better than a 60%!  Nope.  57.6%.  Only one person in First 2 got higher than a 60.  The judge was quite sharp.  My figures were not accurate enough and my horse was hollow in the back and behind my leg.

I forgot how different it is to ride for S judges.  They see everything.  I'll admit to feeling utterly defeated, sitting in my truck looking at those two tests.  I even thought about scratching my next show because what's the point?  I've been working for a year and got nothing.  Worse than nothing, I went down on my First 2 test.

But I spent my two hour drive back trying to remember the positives.  Theo did not spin, buck, bolt, or otherwise try to quit on me the entire day.  He marched into two very scary rings on his own without anyone clutching their pearls or gasping.  My First 3 test was bad.  I'm the first to say it, it was BAD.  It was not at all the test I practiced or wanted.  We still got a 60% from an S judge. 

I really think my first judge saw a distracted, slightly fearful horse and judged us through that lens.  She saw him freeze twice on our way around the ring, she knew he was overwhelmed.  We were tense and had zero forward, but he was with me and was reasonably relaxed by the end of the test.  We squeaked out a 60%.

The second judge didn't see him freeze up or spook, I had already picked him up and didn't let him get a good look around.  She saw our test through a different lens.  She saw a tense horse with a hollow back and a rider that couldn't hit her figures.  She didn't know that my horse was trying to step away from the things he swore he could hear in the trees, she saw a too big circle and hit us with a 4.  We got hit with a 57% which still seems harsh for a First level test where we completed every movement easily, but I can't disagree with any of the comments.  He was tense, his back was dropped, and some of my movements were late due to my pony being distracted and not responding promptly.  My scores were tough, but I can't argue with them.  I really, really want to, but I can't in good conscience. 

Which leaves me utterly disheartened.  I worked so, so hard.  We didn't get to show a bit of it off.

Now we get to spend two weeks practicing riding a test with distractions.  Because if I can't fix this, we'll never be able to move up.  It's not about movements or impulsion or any of that anymore.  It's about him understanding that he needs to go forward into the test and not suck back while fighting my hand so he can pick up his head and stare.  None of that looks good in a dressage test.  We've gotten his adaptation time down to a few minutes, but that's still too long.  We're pretty much through the test by that point.

I'm not 100% sure what we do now.  But I've already paid for the show, so I guess I better figure it out.

Life with a troublemaker

Actual texts I have received about Theo:

Theo busted his gate again.  He's now in the Everglades.

Theo got his foot stuck into fence.  Got stuck, pulled off shoe, flipped himself over.  He was not to thrilled to see baby goats running around.

Theo was kind of an ass to start today.

So the alfalfa worked too good, I guess.  Everyone working on canter and Theo felt the need to ditch [rider] and turn into a stud.  Boot camp week this week?

So Theo was a pig today.

Well today's ride was different.  Your horse kills me.

I've had many people say they love him because he has so much character.  Right.  So much character that I had to lather his ears with pink Swat since he insists on playing fly mask tag with his neighbors and then losing.  I found a halter in his field that didn't belong to him.  Turns out he stole a halter off of a pony and then kept it as a souvenir.

Two weeks ago I was greeted with 'You won't believe what your little monster did today!'.  He'd busted loose, started a fight with two horses, and taken the working students for a run.

Last week I took him into the Ritz for a group lesson.  I received many compliments on my seat and my courage.  It's nice to get compliments, but I'd really rather not get them for my ability to sit the bronco impersonation.

Keeping sane in conference calls with some art to commemorate our lesson

He does like to keep things interesting.

Arrival

Found this in the draft folder, yet another post I never posted because I was waiting for promised pictures.  Well, forget that.  Time to share my progress.

------------

I had a clinician watch me run through me Second Level test and say 'you have it, you have all of the moves, you just need to practice the sequence and smooth out the test'.

I wanted to squeal like a little girl.

I watched my horse cart his beginner adult around in the same clinic, performing leg yield and counter canter while keeping a connection and flexion, letting her learn to sit the trot and how to lengthen the canter.  She doesn't even know a counter canter is hard, he just did it.  She stared at me, wondering why it was a Second Level movement.

I wanted to cry.

He's a school master.  He's a Second Level horse.  He has natural talent for collection and a perfectly acceptable (but not at all impressive) medium.  He has a naturally uphill canter.  A Grand Prix level dressage rider that doesn't know him at all described him as a soft, forgiving horse and just loved him.  No, not a 70% horse, not talented or extravagant or any of that, but far more valuable.  He's the horse the ammy adults want.  He's the horse you can learn on, that will do it if you're close enough.

I learned to invite him up to the higher level frame and was shocked when he simply stepped into it while still licking and chewing.  He tucked his butt, lifted, and met me half way as I worked on refining my understanding of collection.  'It's not about getting to Second Level, this is the frame that will take you to Third and beyond'.

Dressage pony

I'm in tears.

We did it.  While I wasn't looking, while I was questioning everything, we managed to get there.  I had no idea until someone simply expected it of us.  He lifted, I cued, and he gave me a lovely collected trot and shoulder in while chewing away.  Our first run through of the test was terrible because I was so tense.  I was terrified of doing this test that seemed so impossible and out of my league while people where watching me.  Once I remembered how to ride?  We did it.  We comfortably, reliably preformed.  It wasn't scary or a stretch.  It was just another test.  What more could I ask for?

One of my friends at the barn said 'it's rough when you're still riding the horse from one level ago'.  I was.  I was riding First Level Theo.  I now have Second Level Theo.  When he announced he couldn't possibly go in the muddy corner at our western dressage schooling show (he slipped, to be fair), I reset him in the warm up ring.  I brought him up to the new frame, tucked his butt, and took him back in.  75% and reserve champion for the day, up 9 percent in ten minutes.

It's crazy.  I spent so long trying to get here, and here I am.  I don't even know what to do with it.  Aside from start figuring out who has the joy of putting his changes on this winter.  For real, this time.

Fire, torture, and losers - part 3

I waited for two months and I still have no media from this clinic.  So here you go, the final installment of a clinic from all the way back in April.  Fortunately, I had the whole thing written and waiting in the drafts folder.

Yes, we're still alive and doing the dressaging thing.

Random pic of mi papi looking amazing

All of the clinic’s riders were looking a bit rough on that third morning.  We stared at each other with exhausted eyes, wondering how we were going to manage another six hours in the saddle.  Theo was looking pretty tired himself and I left him in his stall so he could focus on getting as much hay in his face as possible.  Being under saddle so much meant he didn’t have as much time to eat and he wasn’t getting as much hay as he usually does.

Our lecture was around different maneuvers that mounted police use to work with crowds.  It was a fairly short lecture, very interesting to hear exactly how mounted police get things done with their horses.  We were told that we’d be practicing an extraction maneuver and I didn’t even have the energy to be worried about the tight formation.  I’m starting to see this mad man’s plan.  Tired riders don’t tend to make for nervous horses.

Theo was very good when he came out for his morning session, learning to walk under an arch that had smoke diffusing through it to look like a wall.  He was not at all a fan of trying to walk through a wall, but by this point it wasn’t the craziest thing I’d asked for and he was slightly more willing.  There was more fire since the group really didn't do well with fire.  So much fire.  One very cool moment was when our little chicken of a Gypsy mare suddenly got brave and trotted straight through the obstacles and fire, feathers flying.  It was like she'd suddenly discovered that forward was an option.  We took our lunch break and went back for our last round of torture.

Theo was not at all interested in going back in that ring.  He suddenly flew sideways dramatically at the squad car that didn't even have the dog or sirens going.  I put on a spur to stop him and that PITA popped up and bucked.  I'd already been told to spin him if he tried to pop up with me again, so I spun him until we were both dizzy.  I headed toward the car, he flew back and started to buck hard.  I spun him again.  I walked toward the car and he sighed and shook his head.  Looked like he was going back to work.  We might have found an answer to that remaining bully behavior.

By the end of our third day, the dial was turned all the way up.  Five obstacles, fire around all five of them, smoke bomb going off on the last obstacle, siren going on the moving squad car.  It was sensory overload.  Smell the smoke, see the fire, feel the pool noodles and teeter totter, taste the gasoline in the air, hear the sirens.  Theo had figured out that his job was to go over those obstacles and if he did, I would pet him and slip him a cookie.  So he sucked himself up and followed the horse in front of him.  It wasn't pretty, he was hard up against my hands at a couple of points when he tried to rush out of this little slice of hell, but he did it on our first attempt.  I was in tears.  Thank goodness for the sunglasses, no one could see.

Our finale was to do an extraction simulation.  Our job was to go in as four pairs, boot to boot and nose to tail.  We were supposed to go up to the squad car (with lights and sirens on), sweep the drunks off of it by getting as close as possible while yelling "Get off the car, stupid!", turn around, and form a V around the car while escorting it out.  The scenario is an emergency vehicle trying to get through a crowd and getting an assist from mounted officers.

I think Theo missed his calling in life.  Our 'drunks' were the instructor and his assistants.  Theo had zero issue with getting right up on that car and shoving them aside.  After a few practice reps, he had the idea that his job was to get people off HIS car and he rather enjoyed it.  He did not enjoy being in a very tight formation with the other horses, but by that point, he was too shellshocked to do more than pin his ears.  For our last pass, we escorted that car across the arena at a slow trot with the dog barking in the back seat and sirens blaring.  It was pretty dang cool.

We got a certificate for completing 30 hours of mounted police training.  By my math, over half of that was in the saddle over three days.  He probably spooked and spun/bolted with me a hundred times over those three days.  Every part of my body hurt.  I have weird bruises on my hands that I can't identify.  I missed the sunscreen on one ear lobe and it was lobster red.  My legs and back have signed a pact to keep me from getting out of any chair. 

Did it work?  Not the way everyone thinks when they see these kinds of clinics.  He's not suddenly braver.  He's not bombproof.  He's the same horse he was three days ago.  What changed is my level of confidence and his response to my pressure.  We kept facing things and making it clear that saying yes was the right response.  By the end, I could feel him fighting me less, trusting that it was going to be okay because I said it would be.  I felt him suck back from something, but then push forward when I closed my calves.  He will still spook and startle, but we've practiced it so many times that I'm confident I can manage it within two steps and we can move on with our lives.  It's not something I have to fear and try to prevent.  I got this horse through smoke and fire and teeter-totters, we can manage the outside of a show ring.

We have a lot left to do.  I need to be able to keep him on task while also having him in that 'up' frame of mind.  I need a couple hundred more reps so he stops considering fighting me.  I need to be ready to stop that bully behavior dead every time it's offered.  I need to acknowledge that behavior for what it is.  I told him to do something and he threw a fit.  That wasn't about fear.  He pushed drunks off that car with the siren blaring, he wasn't scared of it.  He just didn't feel like working anymore and figured he'd try to scare me out of it.  He failed.

This instructor does clinics all over the country.  If you want to experience just what you and your horse can handle, sign up.  Do not expect him to cater to your special pony's needs or your concerns.  You will be thrown into the fire.  Literally.   The more your horse hates it, the more he'll do it.  He's not at all rough and has the patience of a saint, but he also does not mess around.  He didn't even warn us when he started the first fire.  He did scale things back when it was too much for the horses, he doesn't want them to fail.  But he doesn't back off due to spooking and snorting and bolts.  That makes him laugh and do it again.  He would yell 'loser!' every time a horse did something they didn't want to do.  There were many jokes about his favorite thing on a horse being mustard and mayo.  He's gruff and not concerned with being politically correct.  I had to utterly ignore the entire lesson on using the reins since it started with 'whoever came up with that outside rein nonsense was an idiot'.  But his goal is to get a horse to march toward a rioting crowd, not to get a perfect circle in the sandbox.

Will I do it again?  I don't know.  I'm exhausted, physically and mentally.  I will be doing serious business desensitization at the barn to keep up with this work.  I don't know if I could go back to the clinic now that I know what I'm in for.  Do I recommend it?  Not to the faint of heart or anyone genuinely afraid of their horse or riding.  If you've already ridden your horse's spooks and know you can manage it (you don't have to like it), then yes. Do it once.  Plan on the clinic running longer than expected (1.5 to 2 hours longer) and being in the saddle for the majority of the time.  Plan on being exhausted.  Plan on learning to laugh when the mad man with the gasoline can says 'and now we make it fun!'.  Do not expect him to cater to your horse's insecurities.  He will spot them, target them, and beat on them relentlessly.  Expect off color jokes and statements like 'damn, I hate horses, you couldn't give me one'.  'People think I love horses since I train 'em.  They've never seen what I do to 'em.'  Again, not cruel or rough, just finds their spooking hilarious.  He thinks petting horses is stupid and told me my problem was that I talk to my horse too much.  So don't go in expecting a lot of supportive commentary.  He'll make comments about you petting your horse too much, but he won't try to stop you or make it into an issue.

http://www.mountedpolice.org/

Go into it with the expectation that you will come out the other side a different rider and you won't be disappointed.  I've been desensitized more than my horse.  I know I can stop my horse in his loose ring snaffle within two steps even when a fire suddenly springs up in front of him.  I know he can manage being in a crowd.  I have a tool to manage his temper tantrums.  I don't need to use kid gloves with my horse.  I know he can handle more and so can I.